07-24-13

It is a break day – I am trying to make sure that it wasn’t a complete breakdown day, although the definition of that may be elusive right now.
Sometimes, the amount of things on the list is one too many. Sometimes, one negative thought can bring you to a screeching halt. Sometimes, you have to agree that life needs a break – hence, the break day.
A lot of sitting in the darkness, cuddled up with the fan on, and allowing my thoughts to just wander past the negative thoughts that had come to rest in my head. When done correctly, the thoughts that are not congruent with how I want to live my life are allowed to be viewed, but not allowed to roost. I will admit though, the process is exhausting, and I am looking forward to falling asleep with a peaceful heart.
I know that my friends will interpret my break day as worrisome – I feel that we cannot avoid the things that are hard in life. There are hours, days and sometimes weeks that are just plain hard. Life has not always been kind the last 18 months, and it is important to admit that sometimes. However, it is also important to remember that just because it isn’t easy doesn’t mean that it is bad. I do not wallow in these days, but I do allow them to come into my life occasionally to remind me that I am just like everyone else, and that it is okay to remember where I came from.
Today was one of those days.
And it is okay to have one of those days.
Because tomorrow is another day to hit the list, check things off, make an important connection, live my life.
Tomorrow is another day.

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